1.11...a magical date!

January 11th…I am realizing 1.11 is a special day in my life when my heart, mind and soul is fueled by the power and inspiration of human connection as well as my decisions to take follow my heart not my head.  I did not wake up with this realization. It did not hit me until the middle of the day when, after landing in Bangkok, enroute home from 8 days without connectivity traveling through northern Laos. I linked into the free WiFi, opened up Facebook and at the top of my feed was my FB memories.  As I scrolled through it became very clear that 1.11 is a magical day where my courage to try, my love of people and my desire to experience new things instead of listening to advice, guidance or misgivings of others allows me to discover the beauty, strength and joy of the human spirit. Memories from today and past years are reminders to me to keep trying to push myself to follow my heart to push out my belief that human connection is what life is all about and we need to be intentional about making new connections outside of our comfortable bubbles.  Before diving into my past memories of this day, I will start with the ones that were created this morning before my flight out of Laos.

After spending 7 days with a Seattle friend, Xee, and her parents on her return to the home of her birth, the site where they spent five years in a Thai refugee camp and multiple villages/towns that her parents lived in before fleeing their home due to war, we had just an hour before they dropped me off at the airport in Luang Prabang.  Xee, her father and I climbed to the highest point in the town. 

Looking out at the town below, Xee’s father pointed to where he lived from 1964 to 1968 as a student at a Catholic missionary school.  He was 12 years old when he arrived. I asked him if he was nervous leaving his mountain village and going so far away from his family.  He said, “No, I was not. All the children my age either went to the school or they were taken to be soldiers to fight in the war. Most of the kids my age became soldiers.  I came with my schoolmates. Had I not, I would have gone off to fight and probably would not be here today.”

I asked him if it was because of missionaries that he came to be connected with the school.  He said, “Yes, there was an Italian missionary in my village. It is because of him that my family became Catholic.”  I said, “It is because of Catholicism that your family is alive today?” He replied, “Yes.” In that moment my mind was opened to something that I held more negative thoughts than positive ones about, since the mid-90’s from time as a Peace Corps Volunteer in Lesotho.  I had witnessed the negative aspects of missionary efforts and had become closed-minded to the idea that there were positive ones regarding foreigners evangelizing their faith. But because of one human connection in a remote mountain village in Laos, this wonderful Seattleite, who has helped countless Laos individuals and families since arriving in the city in 1980 was able to have a full life, ultimately touching mine.  Over the past week, I have learned from his family’s culture, faith, resourcefulness, gratitude and what it means to be a true survivor. And now my mind was being opened further because of these moments above Luang Prabang. What a way to start a morning.  

Descending the steep steps from the mountain top temple with Xee and her father, I was amazed at all that I have had the good fortune to witness this post week.  Witnessing a woman learning stories of her family’s past, recalling memories of her own, meeting family members for the first time, traveling in her country of birth experiencing affirmation she is more American than Hmong but so grateful for the opportunity to return with her parents on what most likely is their last time returning to Laos.  I met people who I could not communicate with but welcomed me without question. Invited me into their homes. Fed me and urged me to come back. They gave to me with their whole hearts and I felt their sincerity. 

So far from home, unable to communicate, I felt welcomed and safe…and so grateful that I could return to a home that had a real mattress, running water, refrigeration, electricity, freedom of speech, opportunity and my family.  

As I said goodbye at the airport to this family who took me in as their own, my heart was so full.  How lucky was I to have had this opportunity?? One that I never could have imagined or orchestrated if I had tried.  One that only happened because I sat with my kids at a lazy Susan communal table during dim sum rush hour and talked with a woman and her daughter 8 years ago.  And one that never could have happened had I listened to my head telling me, “You are too busy with other work to leave. How does this fit into the work you are doing?  Maybe people are right, you need to pick one thing and focus on it…you are always doing too many things and they don’t seem to go together (but in my head I see them all connected:) You are being selfish leaving your family and work to travel to a place you have already visited.  Even though you think this is important, what could ever come of it? Here you go again, wasting time and not making money…” The reasons not to go were endless in my mind. But my heart kept tugging at my head telling it that it WAS important and this was an experience of a lifetime. 

This trip was not easy.  This trip was not a vacation.  This trip allowed me to see things I have never witnessed.  This trip allowed me to expand my understanding of what it is to be a refugee, an immigrant, a Catholic, a mother in fear of losing her family to gunfire, a family who lost everything except for their will to live and their hope of a better life even when they are told to fear the unknown of a foreign place they know nothing about, people who are so special to Seattle but almost invisible to the people of Seattle. 

I boarded the plane in Luang Prabang filled with gratitude for the experience and with pride for myself to have the courage to not give into the gremlins that tell me to just be happy with the life you have and not push for something different because I cannot articulate its importance.  

As soon as I took my seat on the plane, I opened my laptop to get to work.  I had high hopes that I would read on the trip or at the very minimum get through one audio book that I have had on my night stand for months…Brené Brown’s, “Dare to Lead”, but was only into the 2nd chapter.  I put on my headphones and hit play. And it was as if she was talking directly to me. Her words were assurance that I need to keep on keeping on with just trying my best to push out into the world what is in my heart, head and soul.  For me that is the vital importance of human connection.

After seeing my Facebook memories showing me how incredible this day during my layover in Bangkok, I got on the next flight, went back and looked her words that I underlined as I read because they resonated with me and I knew I would want to look back at them someday.  When I opened the book, I first went to the page where I had been moved to write Human Connectivity Conservation. 

 

Brown’s words gave me assurance, although I will need to give myself daily reminders that doing things differently than have been done is okay and important to go against the grain of “normal”…

And then to today’s memories…
2 years ago today, this video is powerful for me to listen to (and that is saying something because I cannot really stand to listen to my videos...I just share and try to ignore my dislike of my own voice because I have to get out what is in my heart) after just being in a third world country that is severely impacted by all the issues I mention in the video and having been there with people who were forced to flee, I was moved by what I shared in this video. I believe in what I shared and feel exactly the same way today.  We can make a difference. We must come together in community. Be with each other...it really isn't difficult and will provide heart and soul fuel our country needs!

3 years ago today I drove up to Mountlake Terrace, met a wonderful small business owner, Mike Torres (who immediately became Magic Mike to me as soon as I met him) and picked up the first 20 of 200 signs I had been passionate to print because I believe in people and I wanted to take a stand for what I believe. Seeing the memory of the sign going up on the first lawn and then, on the same day, I received 2 orders for 10 signs each. That was a big deal then and is still a very big deal to me. When an individual has the courage to get more than one sign for themselves, to share in their community it makes my heart soar!
And my passion for painting rocks was in full swing and these posts made me smile. We must hold onto hope and be the change we want to see in the world.
On this day, 3 years ago, I could never have imagined I would still be selling signs, painting rodks and filled with even more passion about the importance of spreading the message across this country.

 

4 years ago today...thanks to so many trusting, enthusiastic, talented, unique and inspiring individuals, I somehow was able to realize a crazy dream of creating a ski music parody w/ 30 women who were game to slip into my vintage onesies, sing, dance and ski to raise money for brain cancer research.  I still really can’t believe we did it, but I know we did because I am lucky to hold onto so many memories of the weeks of preparation, the craziness of the day of shooting and the laughter that continues to flow from that undertaking. AND it has lead me to taking one a new venture that is a result of that craziness and another connection because of The World in My Backyard that I am leaning into many areas that are new to me and trusting my inner voice and inspirations.

This was the result of that day on the mountain.

Seeing these memories and then having the one that just happened to me this morning remind me of the brilliance of people and the reason why I can never tell myself to step away from putting myself out there.  I will continue to hold onto the belief that we live in a beautiful world, filled with beautiful unique humans that can support and uplift each other and make our world even better. I am hopeful for the year ahead and already looking forward to what 1.11.21 has in store for me.

If you made it to the end of this long post, I thank you and I apologize in advance for run on sentences, grammatical errors, any repetition and hack photo layouts. Because I was flying from SE Asia it has been a 36 hr day (bonus for me w/ an extended 1.11.20:), I do not have the energy to edit. My head is telling me don't hit "publish" but my heart is telling me to put it out into the world and not worry...just share and hopefully my ramblings will resonate with someone out there!

I am happy to be home, looking forward to the new year ahead and sharing more of the stories I learned while traveling with Xee.